Remember last time when you interviewed for a role and you didn’t get it? You felt, interviewer couldn’t see your potential, and he is probably just a bad person. You didn’t think that maybe what the interviewer was looking for was found in other candidates. You just got effected by self serving bias.
We think the world revolves around us. It’s just the way our mind works.
Think about others to beat self serving bias
We are just a piece of the puzzle, not the puzzle itself. When we go out in the world, we should get out of our minds and remember that everyone is thinking about themselves, and if you want to fit in, you have to be considerate of others’ emotions and needs.
There is a very good Dale Carnegie quote: “To be interesting, be interested.”
Dale Carnegie was trying to use the same concept to help us become better communicators. We have to think about others.
Be interested to be interesting
I have noticed that in a conversation, when I ask more questions and just listen, even if I am not talking, I am perceived as a good communicator. Now that’s a great insight. If you want to leave a good impression, forget about talking; just ask questions to understand other people, and if you talk, talk about others. I know it’s painful to not talk about ourselves, but that’s what it takes.
When you start seeing the world through another person’s eyes, your emotional intelligence shoots up. You will understand your partner and your friends much better. I read this line somewhere that made so much sense: “If you want to win a negotiation/conversation, try seeing the situation from other people’s eyes. The better you understand their perspective, the greater the chances of changing their behavior.”
In the end, it’s just refreshing to be someone who cares about others and listens to others vs. someone who doesn’t stop talking about themselves. Try this today and let me know how it goes.
Thank you for reading!
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